The adventures of Columbo

Columbo was on the phone to his mate one day when he reecived a text from a man at work who was probably having a poo.

Columbo did not enjoy this as he was trying to do some work himself/chat to his mate cos the work was really boring.

So COlumbo read the text, and did what the text said even though he couldnt really be arsed.

Which meant that this story is shit
The End

Columbo was happily talking to his friend Mike one day when a large bang was heard on the street in normally quiet Lodoreton.

Mike and Columbo ran to the front door to find that, almost unbelievably, a helicopter had crashed into their neighbour Malcolm's roof!

Columbo, remembering his training as a police attack sniffer search and rescue dog darted towards Malcolms' front door.

Unfortunately however he was unable to open it, not due to the large fire that was rampaging behind the closed door, but because Columbo is a dog thus lacks opposable thumbs so could not operate the simple handle.

2 fire enginges, a paramedic, a super observant community support officer and an ice cream van quickly arrived on the scene and screeched to a halt.

Columbo sat across the street and watched as the fire spread through the now decimated house and wept as the screams of Malcolm and his children got fainter yet more piercing with every piecing minute that they remained in there home-turned-incinerator.

Mike suggested that they head to 'spoons for a zeeboo steak. Columbo doesn't really like Zeeboo, but he fancied a pint of Pedigree chum, so they meandered down the road together.

The End.

nite Mike xx

Columbo made an agreement with Mike to do something interesting each week while Mike had gone home to work at popular luxury food store Marks and (for legal reasons) Twencers.

This weekend however Columbo had gone home to see his parents. He was also going to see his friend Ben, who Columbo is quite sure, despite Nickys accusations, is not gay.

So Columbo hasnt been up to much exciting. He has perfected the back stroke though. And he had a pint with Pudsey the bear earlier in the week. Perhaps he will appear again some day soon...

Columbo was in a rush one day, for he had seminar prep to be getting on with and the torts stuff was reeeeally hard

So columbo grabbed his laptop between his teeth and ran down the road to his friend Jades house. Sadly on the way he tripped over his tail and dropped his laptop.

As Columbo stared sadly at the shattered remains of his Toshiba Latima 41E his arch nemisis the super observant community support officer drove past in a Renault Megane Scenic 1.2 tdi pointing and laughing at our canine companion.

"woof!" Columbo barked, as he thought to himself 'can it be?!'

Indeed it was, the community support officer had returned from his Eastenders themed bar in Mallorca for reasons that shall, no doubt, be explained in a later installment of COLUMBO THE DOG